- Weight - About that many. I will weigh when I get in the shower. Hopefully it's still in the right direction.
I'm licking my screen. I can smell that cinnamon roll from over here. Luckily I do not have that kind of food at my disposal, so the worst that could happen? An Atkins bar, in cinnamon, which I do not like in the least. I do, however, have pig fat in the cheese drawer. (Maybe BLT for dinner? Wait, I have no T and no L aside from mixed greens that the kids won't touch. Phhhhllllbt. I don't need it anyway.)
Here's to another day of TRYING. I ended yesterday within limits.
Today, I will attempt to end below limits. I wish I could make a protein shake STICK in my guts, if it did, I could I so do it all day long. I LIKE THEM. I AM A FREAK. My biggest problem is that they shoot through my pouch and into my 'stines immediately and it's time to eat again. Add fruit, yum, and it lasts longer, but sometimes crashes my blood sugar, so I have to eat again!
The cure for that is to eat a side of a cow all day long. I got through one bite of steak last night. ONE. I cannot eat dense meat like that. I quit and ate cooked carrots and one-half a small potato. Hello carbs.
It's got to be cooked in liquid, raw or shredded meat. Enter in shredded meat? Then I want shit on it, mayo, BBQ... killing the point of having dense meat only. Again I get to the place where I realize turkey breast is the only way to go here, plain turkey, maybe a touch of whatever on it. It likes me, I like it. We're good.
I know what I should be eating. It's not that. It's the calories. I could eat meat, beans and greens all day long, but keeping it in a low calorie range is killer. Sure, I could try to go super-low carb to screw the calories (it works!!) but that throws a lot of what I live on, out the window. There's got to be a balance.
It's another long day, Dad has class tonight. For those of you who rolled your eyes about it, here is the thing... he is terrified that his company is slicing and dicing due to the financial world's status. If he loses his job, we are up the creek without a paddle, and I can't swim very well. Because?
Even if I could drive, working outside of the house is next to impossible to consider with the cost of daycare. Once this wild child is in school for more than a few hours a day, I could swing something, but nothing will pay me enough to pay for care/gas to make it worth anybody's time. My hire-able skills? HA.
I am 'worth' about $10 an hour. $10 per hour for what, 20 hours a week, during school? What does care cost? You see, I will end up negative. I was making coffee in my last outside work, it gave me pocket money. Yeah. Not going to cut it to pay bills.
He started this class as a life-preserver, just in case the horrible happens, he will have at least one other hire-able option on his resume. Why? He has had a handful of things I will not refer to, and it doesn't seem that the grass is any greener elsewhere at this time, and he really, really NEEDS his job that he HAS. He was turned down for one, because he asked for equal pay, and was told he was the candidate of choice, but they can't match pay. Another is pending, but grass/green? Who knows. It's scary no matter what.
He is taking online courses for business and face-to-face courses for Emergency Medicine. He never made it through much of college the first time years ago, because he came home to work to support the insta-family we had.
Edited to add: We are lucky. At least he still has his job.
- Atkins Bar (180)
- Power Crunch (190)
- Baby Lettuce/no cal dressing
- Ginger Snaps
- Summer squash, Perdue Chicken Nuggets, two bites brown rice
- Pure Protein
