MM - BBGC - Life After WLS

Your mom goes to college.

I'm matriculating.  That sounds naughty.  (And, I would like to know why Zemanta - the plug in that I have added that adds the links lately, is offering to add a photo of the POPE to this post?)

I just got off the phone with the financial aid advisor, and I was able to get enough Financial Aid to cover at least part time courses for this year.  Next year, perhaps three-quarter time and maybe then full-time courses, and so on.  Frankly, I'm surprised.  But, it's covered in full!

Part-time is good.  Considering my likelihood of walking away from the computer and sometimes not having 100% attention, tasks may take me extra time.

The first class, is a class on how to teach me how to take a class.  That will do.

After that, delving into topics around:  Advertising.  

Advertising Degree

Bachelor of Science Degree Online Program

Are you surprised?  Did you think I would choose Animal Husbandry?

Click - $18.99

Click for wicked cheap right now at netrition!

 
 

I am a marketing genius. Who has the capital?

I currently have a huge pile of sopping wet laundry on the basement floor.  Because, I washed it with a clean night-time diaper.  If you don't have kids, haven't had the experience of throwing a kid in a diaper in a tub/pool/ocean or letting a diaper get TOO WET?  It's a mess.  The absorbent gel from inside the diaper, comes out, looks like little crystals, and goes everywhere.  And, when you put one in the washing machine?  It's super fun!

http://www.gzespace.com/gzenew/index.php?pg=hydrogel&lang=en

Hydrogels are hydrophilic polymer networks that are able to swell and retain large amounts of water and maintain their three-dimensional structures. The term Hydrogel is used at the same time for the dry substance and for the water charged gel. These polymers do not dissolve in water; upon swelling, they increase in volume, but keep their shape without breaking up. Hydrogels could be divided into Super Absorbent Polymer (SAPs) and Super Porous Hydrogels (SPHs). In general, the amount of water absorbed by the hydrogel is at least 20% of its total weight,, but SAPs are able to absorb large amount of liquid, up to 200%. The Super Porous Hydrogel, instead, is a 3-dimensional network of polymer that absorbs a large amount of water (up to 400%) in a very short period of time, due to the presence of interconnected microscopic pores.
Responsive hydrogels can reversibly change volume in response to slight changes in the properties of the medium including pH, temperature, electric field, ionic strength, salt type, solvent, external stress, or light.
Responsive hydrogels found many different applications because of their interesting properties: as a super absorbent material in diaper, as insulator construction materials, as water retention material in agricultural applications, in showing to obtain the artificial snow, in cosmetic and pharmaceutics industry, in artificial organs and tissue engineering, in wound dressings and in fire protection. Most hydrogels are highly bio compatible and have extremely low toxicity to the human body, eg, hydrogel products such as contact lenses and surgical dressings are being used successfully.

Image via Wikipedia  

WLGlobs^mm!  

Re-formulate and repackage the water soluble diaper gels as a weight loss product.   

• Expands INSTANTLY with moisture added!
• Blocks your stomach capacity!
• Binds you up for HOURS!
• Renders you digestively useless until it passes!

How could one NOT lose weight?

^{*DISCLAIMER - OF COURSE THIS IS NOT A GOOD IDEA.  DON'T EVEN CONSIDER IT.  I AM MAKING A JOKE.  IF YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND JOKES, PLEASE CLICK ON THE ON IN THE UPPER RIGHT HAND SIDE OF THE BLOG.  THANK YOU!}  

Would she have the DS again?

A video from Lori - several years post op after her duodenal switch - a very realistic view of her feelings of life now.  This is awesome to see - because she's telling the truth.  

If you listen carefully - many of the same foods that bother her as a DS'er are the same issues that bother me as a roux en y gastric bypass post op.  

And, clearly, she's much, much thinner.  ;)

I failed my test.

I failed wait, it's a good result, actually, if that makes any sense for my mixed meal blood testing.  
I picked a DEFINITE TRIGGER FOOD - a glazed cake donut - and ate as much of it as I felt comfortable eating without dropping dead.  Someone on Facebook asked:  "Why would you do that to yourself?"  Um, because, it's a DEFINITE TRIGGER FOOD.  I WANTED A REACTION.  I wanted my blood sugar to DROP DRAMATICALLY LOW.   I don't make a habit of eating donuts, even if I post about that kind of thing, often.  ^{(It's usually just to piss you off.)}

 
 My blood sugar went from 80 > *ate a donut* > 193 > 67.   IN THREE FREAKING HOURS.  That's it?  That's all you have?

I drop to the 30's when I eat cereal.  I am less than impressed with my body today.  The cut-off for this test is 55 mg. of blood glucose.  I never dropped that low, CRAZY!

The endocrinologist suggested that it's possible that a single food, a single time, while sitting and not doing anything isn't enough.  Had I been home, cleaning house, out walking, or had eaten in a pattern, I'd likely have DROPPED INTO A COMA.  (My words.)  

I often drop on much less, much, much quicker.  

This was the longest three hours of my life.  At least this time, I did not shit my pants, or have a seizure. 

I guess it wasn't a total fail.  (I mean, I passed.  My body did the RIGHT THING.)  LOL.

The treatment is the same, regardless, since I still have a serious problem.  Dietary controls and medication.  I am not seeking further pancreas testing at this time, it doesn't look like I am dealing with an insulinoma that would be removed surgically.

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