Appropriate? You'd think we would know better than not to listen to that kind of input - but it sort of infiltrates your brains. I got an email from a Facebook friend, she shared that someone on weight loss support page posted about weight loss bloggers.
The poster asked basically, if anyone should read anything or take advice from bloggers who are fat. Bloggers after WLS, whom are still fat, specifically.
Enter exhibit A: Your friendly WLS Blogger Beth, weighing in with a BMI of 29.6 this morning. (The horror!)
- Underweight = <18.5
- Normal weight = 18.5–24.9
- Overweight = 25–29.9
- Obesity = BMI of 30 or greater
Your friendly WLS blogger was "obese" until a few days ago. Yes, OBESE.
In fact, I've been in the obese BMI range for much of the past year. (OH NO! CLOSE THE PAGE RIGHT NOW, BETH IS AN OBESE SOW, YOU MIGHT CATCH HER DISEASE OF MORBID OBESITY.)
I am six years and five months post op. I weigh 167 pounds and I am 5 feet 3 inches tall. This is pretty much an average weight of the last six years. This is basically ME, where I land.
The question is, since I am still FAT, do my words mean less?
If I were 150 lbs, am I worth more as a blogger? 140, 130, 120? Underweight? Is there a guideline? If I were 130 pounds -- would I get more respect (SHAKING HEAD VEHEMENTLY YES, I KNOW I WOULD.) as a person, as a blogger?
Skinny Beth is/was much more respected than pudgy Beth who is much more respected than very morbidly obese Beth.
I do note the gushing love that some online personas (Anyone, on Youtube, Facebook, elsewhere...it's a phenomenon, watch...) GET when they drop weight and get to a low point. That gushing stops when they go back to a normal body size. It's GOT to mess with their heads. I'm watchng at least two people I know play with serious ED, you know, to get as small as possible post WLS.
Shut up about 167 pounds "not being fat" because OMG!! you can't wait to get under 200 lbs. I get that 1,000,000% over. I get it. I get it. But, from the perception of a fellow WLS person-at-goal, I AM FAT. (Technically.)
A WLS person-at-goal might look at a 167 pound post op as a failure. Especially when they're in the magical sparkly time of I Am Better Than All Of You Fat Smelly People. I Just Lost All MY Weight And Will Never Regain, Bitches!
"Heh, look at her with her fat legs, she sucks." It is just reality. I do NOT feel that way.
I have a very, very different perception of success post WLS. And, it is NOT about weight. (Different post.)
But, clearly, if this person posted it, it's something to be discussed. You know people think it.
Are WE, the STILL OVERWEIGHT AFTER WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY or even simply AFTER MASSIVE WEIGHT LOSS via diet, to be ignored because we "obviously" fuck up? (Again, not the way I feel. That's someone else's perception of a fat person post WLS.)
You will notice something unique about the blogging world of people-during-and-after-weight-loss. Folks will write their HEARTS OUT before they lose weight, during weight loss, and then they disappear. Poof, gone. Sometimes it's a good thing because they've moved on to a different time of life, and they're out climbing mountains and shit. However, oftentimes, they stop sharing because they start "failing."
For me, I know the moment I announced my pregnancy in 2006 on this blog, I changed the header to ducks or something and immediately stopped referring to weight. It was like, "THAT'S IT! NO MORE WEIGHT TALK! I AM GAINING!"
But, I carried on, because I know that there's lots of you out there who don't. I get emails from people that had WLS back in the dark ages, who used to chat with me, they come back and say, "I don't know what happened, I can't believe you're still writing, I need help!" I truly feel that staying in touch keeps you grounded in so many ways, and keeps you at a certain level of "success" that you might not maintain on your OWN.
Yeah, I said it. SUCCESS. I am successful. BOOYAH. RAAR.
Maybe not to "her," the blog-reader who doesn't like pudgy post WLS patients, but <insert curse word> her.
Post ops like "her" are busy trying to idolize someone who lies about their weight, newsflash!! The Internet? IT LIES. Go read some weight loss blogs, in depth. I challenge you. Go see what people are REALLY DOING. They're not sipping protein and playing with shake weights, honey.