Posts categorized "Bullying" Feed

Sell your loose skin on Instagram

I know I promised to write a bariatric approved product review.  

But first, this that showed up in my suggested Google links.

Screen Shot 2017-01-18 at 10.25.28 AM

Girl, what are you thinking?  Why are we flopping our fupa all over the Instagram and sharing/errr selling it to The Sun UK?  We know that shit is real.  (Did she really make a single account for, um, skin?)

Screen Shot 2017-01-18 at 10.31.31 AM

For a moment I am tempted to pull out the skin I AM IN -- you know -- IN POST WEIGHT LOSS SOLIDARITY, after losing 170 pounds and having two babies and start a fupa social media campaign.  

But, uh, no.  It's very, very real.  We are quite aware.  You don't have to flop it on Insta to prove it to any-one.   

Loose skin needs a song by Beyonce.  Write it?


Hollaback - Walking as a ... woman?

"In hopes to demonstrate the absolute awfulness that is catcalling, one woman recently took to the streets of Manhattan with a hidden camera to show just how humiliating, and downright horrifying, it can be to be just that–a woman."

DAAAAAAAAAAAYUM.

For what it's worth -- I lasted about ten minutes out there on my own when I went to New York City by myself for a TV show taping.  

Could not hang. 

 

 


Read Gabourey Sidibe’s Wonderful Speech From the Ms. Foundation Gala

Read Gabourey Sidibe’s Wonderful Speech From the Ms. Foundation Gala.

"How are you so confident?" "I'm an asshole!" Okay? It's my good time, and my good life, despite what you think of me. I live my life, because I dare. I dare to show up when everyone else might hide their faces and hide their bodies in shame. I show up because I'm an asshole, and I want to have a good time. And my mother and my father love me. They wanted the best life for me, and they didn't know how to verbalize it. And I get it. I really do. They were better parents to me than they had themselves. I'm grateful to them, and to my fifth grade class, because if they hadn't made me cry, I wouldn't be able to cry on cue now. [Dabs tears] If I hadn't been told I was garbage, I wouldn't have learned how to show people I'm talented. And if everyone had always laughed at my jokes, I wouldn't have figured out how to be so funny. If they hadn't told me I was ugly, I never would have searched for my beauty. And if they hadn't tried to break me down, I wouldn't know that I'm unbreakable. [Dabs tears] So when you ask me how I'm so confident, I know what you're really asking me: how could someone like me be confident? Go ask Rihanna, asshole!"


Stop. Be brave.


What do you do when your voice is gone? Plus being a bully makes your health better, no wonder you look so good.

I have many, many faults.  I know this.  

Yesterday I found myself hockey checked off of a social network for a temporary ban.  Gasp!  Shock!  Horror!  You might think I did something awful to deserve the "jailing" but it sometimes works in reverse on social networks.  When a person outs a wrong or blows the whistle -- sometimes THAT PERSON -- in this case me gets tossed offline for saying the word.  

My theory about this: is that Facebook is so big, so many users, that it's team of eyeballs that look-over-the-things-that-offend-the-people cannot possibly fathom the Things That Offend Each End User Of It's Free Service.  

Even when someone like me -- gets a thinly veiled threat or not at all veiled -- and I re-post it -- I get the boot.

Hell, I could not even follow it.  All I knew is that someone posted they wanted me in the ground - there was a shovel and salt.  AND I DO NOT KNOW WHAT I DID TO DESERVE IT - aside from my last post.  Which is my TRUTH.  MY.  TRUTH. 

Soon, there were two dozen angry rabid post weight loss surgery patients, (some that were former members of my group, some that I did not know) jumping on a hate filled thread on Facebook -- name-calling and wanting me in a hole, too.  Why?  I have the thread.  It may or may not still be going.  I don't know.  It is painful to read.  I was called a bitch, a victim, and worse.

Download For beth aka melting mama

And for attempting to stand up for myself, I am the one in the Facebook slammah.  Facebook's popo clearly can't follow the chain of events and regard my actions as the problem.  The persons whom are actually at fault are publicly posting and GLOATING about their success in getting a person bullied offline.

One is accepting cash donations.  Why?  

9e2be4d00b6f8904c5ae1888c1be97c1

So.  Here I am.  In jail.  Eating mush.  Getting violated.

Hey, I suppose I shouldn't knock it too hard, it's free delivered food, free clothes, and a place to sleep, with no kids to bother me - and do I have to pay taxes?  <g>

Might not be a bad idea.  Screw it.

I hope you feel better about yourself today.

2013-06-05-onlinebullying

  • http://health.usnews.com/health-news/articles/2014/05/12/adult-health-better-for-bullies-than-their-victims-study
  • Because inflammation is an underlying factor in so many chronic diseases, the fact that people in their early 20s are already showing signs of inflammation is a warning bell, Copeland adds. Using data from the larger study, his team will scrutinize other measures of adversity, such as the stress hormone cortisol, and epigenetic changes in which environmental factors affect the way genes are activated. The scientists will also look for biomarkers of more positive methods than bullying through which kids can increase their confidence and social standing.
  • This is why SO many bullied kids are FAT.  STOP IT.


The results of the anti-Beth campaign

It is funny how people are.  When a thing happens and people say things like, "Don't worry, we will always have your back" and how you sort of know they don't mean it.  It is interesting how they will find ways to weasel out of your existence, quietly, so that you do not notice.  

One year ago I attended a weight loss related event and a thing happened.  Friends and businesses alike, sent me all kinds of messages of support:  WE HAVE YOUR BACK AND WE STAND BEHIND YOU GO DO ALL THE THINGS AS YOU ALWAYS DID!  

Edited to add - I also find it curious that these people are always willing to privately hoo-rah me - but never stand up in public after I've supported them for years and years.  I guarantee private emails will follow this.   

And then they were gone.  Crickets, guys.   This coming from the woman who had no less than 30 lbs of free PLEASEWRITEABOUTOUR protein in her house at any given moment - NADA.  I have 6,000 members in a support group and I take Walmart vitamins.  Is selling out --- worth my sanity?  

Meh.

So, if you're responsible for the Anti-Beth-PR-Campaign because of what I DID on year ago?  (If you don't know, don't ask.)  GO YOU.  Be proud of what you did.  Pat yourself on the back. 

You may have noticed by the slowing-to-a-stall blogging that I lost my mojo.  It was partly due to this, and ironically enough (... and I have said this before)  I am doing "better than ever" in terms of my weight loss surgery life -- which is WHAT MY BLOG IS ABOUT.  

I just ain't got time for fake people.  I got old, guys.  I got teenagers up in here and it's all drama, all the TIME, and who needs adults with drama?  No more.  No thank you.  All done.  I realized a year ago that it just wasn't worth it - and I gave up a lot of things.  I dropped 1,000 people on my Facebook feed and just let go.  I rarely see anything anymore and it is calm.  I tell people it's puppies, babies, puppies and occasional food.

The only problem with this is -- when you no longer are a part of the drama -- you don't get invited to the stuff.   Apparently to get invited To The Things, you need to Be Dramatic.  

Well shit, go me.  And no, I'm not willing to go back.  I kind of like it quiet and calm.   

 


Harsh Physical Punishment in Childhood and Adult Physical Health

Is physical punishment in childhood linked to obesity?  (I hear you screaming YES!)  

http://www.drsharma.ca/physical-punishment-and-obesity.html

Study -

Harsh Physical Punishment in Childhood and Adult Physical Health.

BACKGROUND:  The use of physical punishment is controversial. No studies have comprehensively examined the relationship between physical punishment and several physical health conditions in a nationally representative sample. The current study investigated possible associations between harsh physical punishment (ie, pushing, grabbing, shoving, slapping, and hitting) in the absence of more severe child maltreatment (ie, physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, physical neglect, emotional neglect, and exposure to intimate partner violence) and several physical health conditions.

METHODS:  Data were from the National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions collected in 2004 and 2005 (n = 34 226 in the current analysis). The survey was conducted with a representative US adult population sample (20 years or older). Eight past year physical health condition categories were assessed. Models were adjusted for sociodemographic variables, family history of dysfunction, and Axis I and II mental disorders.

RESULTS:  Harsh physical punishment was associated with higher odds of cardiovascular disease (borderline significance), arthritis, and obesity after adjusting for sociodemographic variables, family history of dysfunction, and Axis I and II mental disorders (adjusted odds ratios ranged from 1.20 to 1.30).

CONCLUSIONS:  Harsh physical punishment in the absence of child maltreatment is associated with some physical health conditions in a general population sample. These findings inform the ongoing debate around the use of physical punishment and provide evidence that harsh physical punishment independent of child maltreatment is associated with a higher likelihood of physical health conditions.


Shane Koyczan: "To This Day" ... for the bullied and beautiful

Shane Koyczan:

  • "To This Day" ... for the bullied and beautiful

This. Man.   Yes this is a complilation of the video I shared before -- it has MORE.  

To This Day


When I was a kid
I used to think that pork chops and karate chops
were the same thing
I thought they were both pork chops
and because my grandmother thought it was cute
and because they were my favourite
she let me keep doing it

not really a big deal

one day
before I realized fat kids are not designed to climb trees
I fell out of a tree
and bruised the right side of my body

I didn’t want to tell my grandmother about it
because I was afraid I’d get in trouble
for playing somewhere that I shouldn’t have been

a few days later the gym teacher noticed the bruise
and I got sent to the principal’s office
from there I was sent to another small room
with a really nice lady
who asked me all kinds of questions
about my life at home

I saw no reason to lie
as far as I was concerned
life was pretty good
I told her “whenever I’m sad
my grandmother gives me karate chops”

this led to a full scale investigation
and I was removed from the house for three days
until they finally decided to ask how I got the bruises

news of this silly little story quickly spread through the school
and I earned my first nickname

pork chop

to this day
I hate pork chops

I’m not the only kid
who grew up this way
surrounded by people who used to say
that rhyme about sticks and stones
as if broken bones
hurt more than the names we got called
and we got called them all
so we grew up believing no one
would ever fall in love with us
that we’d be lonely forever
that we’d never meet someone
to make us feel like the sun
was something they built for us
in their tool shed
so broken heart strings bled the blues
as we tried to empty ourselves
so we would feel nothing
don’t tell me that hurts less than a broken bone
that an ingrown life
is something surgeons can cut away
that there’s no way for it to metastasize

it does

she was eight years old
our first day of grade three
when she got called ugly
we both got moved to the back of the class
so we would stop get bombarded by spit balls
but the school halls were a battleground
where we found ourselves outnumbered day after wretched day
we used to stay inside for recess
because outside was worse
outside we’d have to rehearse running away
or learn to stay still like statues giving no clues that we were there
in grade five they taped a sign to her desk
that read beware of dog

to this day
despite a loving husband
she doesn’t think she’s beautiful
because of a birthmark
that takes up a little less than half of her face
kids used to say she looks like a wrong answer
that someone tried to erase
but couldn’t quite get the job done
and they’ll never understand
that she’s raising two kids
whose definition of beauty
begins with the word mom
because they see her heart
before they see her skin
that she’s only ever always been amazing

he
was a broken branch
grafted onto a different family tree
adopted
but not because his parents opted for a different destiny
he was three when he became a mixed drink
of one part left alone
and two parts tragedy
started therapy in 8th grade
had a personality made up of tests and pills
lived like the uphills were mountains
and the downhills were cliffs
four fifths suicidal
a tidal wave of anti depressants
and an adolescence of being called popper
one part because of the pills
and ninety nine parts because of the cruelty
he tried to kill himself in grade ten
when a kid who still had his mom and dad
had the audacity to tell him “get over it” as if depression
is something that can be remedied
by any of the contents found in a first aid kit

to this day
he is a stick of TNT lit from both ends
could describe to you in detail the way the sky bends
in the moments before it’s about to fall
and despite an army of friends
who all call him an inspiration
he remains a conversation piece between people
who can’t understand
sometimes becoming drug free
has less to do with addiction
and more to do with sanity

we weren’t the only kids who grew up this way
to this day
kids are still being called names
the classics were
hey stupid
hey spaz
seems like each school has an arsenal of names
getting updated every year
and if a kid breaks in a school
and no one around chooses to hear
do they make a sound?
are they just the background noise
of a soundtrack stuck on repeat
when people say things like
kids can be cruel?
every school was a big top circus tent
and the pecking order went
from acrobats to lion tamers
from clowns to carnies
all of these were miles ahead of who we were
we were freaks
lobster claw boys and bearded ladies
oddities
juggling depression and loneliness playing solitaire spin the bottle
trying to kiss the wounded parts of ourselves and heal
but at night
while the others slept
we kept walking the tightrope
it was practice
and yeah
some of us fell

but I want to tell them
that all of this shit
is just debris
leftover when we finally decide to smash all the things we thought
we used to be
and if you can’t see anything beautiful about yourself
get a better mirror
look a little closer
stare a little longer
because there’s something inside you
that made you keep trying
despite everyone who told you to quit
you built a cast around your broken heart
and signed it yourself
you signed it
“they were wrong”
because maybe you didn’t belong to a group or a click
maybe they decided to pick you last for basketball or everything
maybe you used to bring bruises and broken teeth
to show and tell but never told
because how can you hold your ground
if everyone around you wants to bury you beneath it
you have to believe that they were wrong

they have to be wrong

why else would we still be here?
we grew up learning to cheer on the underdog
because we see ourselves in them
we stem from a root planted in the belief
that we are not what we were called we are not abandoned cars stalled out and sitting empty on a highway
and if in some way we are
don’t worry
we only got out to walk and get gas
we are graduating members from the class of
fuck off we made it
not the faded echoes of voices crying out
names will never hurt me

of course
they did

but our lives will only ever always
continue to be
a balancing act
that has less to do with pain
and more to do with beauty.


THIGH GAP!? WHAT. THE. EFF?!

A friend posted on Facebook this morning -

"I just watched a news blip about a new teenage girl/young female obsession: the "thigh gap", ie: in order to be beautiful, you must have a large gap between your thighs when your knees are touching. It's one thing if your body is naturally made this way, but it's another to starve yourself to attain an unnatural shape. I can guarantee, no man every looked at Kate Upton, Cindy Crawford, Claudia Schiffer, or Marilyn Monroe and thought: "Man, she's hot, but I wish she had more thigh gap."

Let me just say, in full disclosure, it looks much more desperate on grown-ass adult women.  Cut. it. out.


Joan Rivers on David Letterman Pokes Fun at Adele

Joan, Joan, Joan.  You're just NOT funny.

Via OAC - because David Letterman is on way past my bedtime.
Mrhumphreys
Joan Rivers - Someone who has gone to great lengths to alter her own appearance through multitudes of plastic surgeries and gets paid to make fun of people based on how they look. A case-study in no self-esteem. Look in the mirror, Joan. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_kc67DurG2I

Ms. Rivers negatively stigmatized Adele by making a hand gesture about Adele’s physical size. She later went on to say to Mr. Letterman, “What is her song? Rolling in the deep? She should add fried chicken.” Joan then continued to elaborate on a conversation she had with Adele where the singer expressed nervousness regarding singing at the show due to trouble swallowing. Joan commented to Mr. Letterman regarding this story by saying “Oh yea, you can swallow,” while at the same time making the hand gesture referencing Adele’s physique.

To view the video, click here.

The OAC feels Ms. Rivers’ comments were highly inappropriate and only further stigmatizes individuals affected by the disease of obesity. Ms. Rivers’ forte for commenting on Hollywood’s fashion taste does not provide her the right to mock someone’s physical appearance. The OAC now wants YOU to respond to this issue as a “Bias Buster.”

Share Your Opinion!

If you feel Ms. Rivers’ comments were stigmatizing, please contact her at the number or email listed below:

Joan Rivers Worldwide Enterprises: 212-751-2028 or customerservice@joan.co.
(*Please copy the OAC on all emails at biasbusters@obesityaction.org.)


Things Girls Lie About

"No, right?"*stomps off*

"You'd NEVER."

"Like, EVER.

 


Community Responsibility - Fat Shaming - Bullying

WAY TO GO!

"That man’s words mean nothing to me, but really angers me about this is is there are children who don’t know better — who get emails as critical as the one I received or in many cases, even worse, each and every day."

She said that bullying scared her as the mother of three daughters. "If you are at home and you are talking about the fat newslady, guess what?" she said. "Your children are probably going to go to school and call someone fat."

Livingston thanked the viewers, friends and colleagues who have stood up for her, and ended with these words:

“I leave you with this: To all of the children out there who feel lost, who are struggling with your weight, with the color of your skin, your sexual preference, your disability, even the acne on your face, listen to me right now. do not let your self-worth be defined by bullies. Learn from my experience — that the cruel words of one are nothing compared to the shouts of many.”


EEG Results - My poor brains - and do you still think I'm attention whoring and faking?

I got the first wave of bills from my health insurer yesterday for my vacation in the neurology unit at my hospital.  We have a 90/10 plan, so, yeah... seven days.  That's a lot of money.  While I left the hospital and immediately enjoyed 15 days seizure-free on new medication, the seizures came BACK.  I am now back in my regular pattern of complex partial seizures every 3-7 days, including this morning at 6am.  "Yay."

I just emailed my neurologist to let him know, when I noted that my EEG results were online.  I suppose you will believe me NOW?

Continue reading "EEG Results - My poor brains - and do you still think I'm attention whoring and faking?" »