melting mama

Attack Cardio!

Attack Cardio with Vinnie Jones from Vinnie Jones

mizfit's muscle in minutes! You can do itz ANYWHERE.

I have the itch.

It's a good sign when I go outside and it's 26 degrees, and it feels like a heat-wave and I have the urge to go walking.  That is a sign!  If it goes over freezing - I WILL get my sorry ass out there and walk this week.  I will.  

I keep giving the treadmill a glance when I walk by it to do laundry, but I just don't use it.  Between my laziness for ACTUAL typical exercise, I can't stand using it.  I am bored in about two and a half minutes and dizzy in five, and looking for glucose in thirty minutes.  At least outside, I feel like I have less of a chance of falling flat on my face, falling into traffic seems more pleasant.

Excuses, I haz 'em.

I also have a copy of Dancing with the Stars: Dance Body Tone:

...which could be the first exercise DVD I have owned since my VHS copies of Richard Simmon's Sweatin' To The Oldies and a Susan Powter one. 

All I know is that I had better get my ass moving if I want to continue blogging as post WLS "success" -- nobody wants to watch a train wreck. Or maybe they do. :x

O-O

Is stress an aerobic exercise?

This is getting harder to do with the kids home.  That's not an excuse.  It's the truth.  I have FOUR.  One kid? 

That's easy.  Toss her diapey butt in the stroller and go. 

Two?  Not so much, number two is not equipped to go for four miles on a bike.  She drops after about two. 

 

Three?  Number three can do it - he's good to go - but he whines if it's not what he WANTS to do.   He wants to watch "Star Wars."

 

Number four - forget it.  She needs to do it, wants to do it, but it's overwhelming, my walk is too much for her.  I try to take her on shorter excursions, without bikes, because the bike makes her twitch.  She hates riding.  She prefers to walk, but is much slower than I, and we have to take our time.  She has to be prepared for the walk, and she has to bring supplies, canteens, cell-phones, emergency rations and she's a lot like me.

 

All five of us (without Dad)  just "don't work" as a unit for exercise purposes.  Sure, we still do it for "fun," but if I want to have my actual exercise, I have to go on my own, or just with one or two kids, unless I claim STRESS as an AEROBIC EXERCISE.

Pedobeth.

Lady Footlocker is closing in our mall, and my husband grabbed two pair of 60% off sneakers for me.  Who cares if they're in colors I would not normally pick - they were 60% off.  He still spent the same amount I would spend, because, I never buy full price, I buy BOGO or 50% or more off - so - whatever, but I have two new pair of running sneakers. 

Not that I run - but - I walk.  The Nike's that I have been wearing faithfully since I did that initial shoe review are holding up alright, and have even made it through the washing machine twice, but I have logged some serious miles in them. 

I suppose I could try to add up the miles they have taken me?  Let me find that post.  Okay, so that might be a little too much math for Beth Of Little Brain - but I have been walking about 3-5 miles about 5-7 times a week since the third week in April.  That's like a word problem right there. 

If Beth walked 4 miles 5 times a week for 12 weeks, how many miles did she walk by the end of the 12 weeks and how many pairs of sneakers did she wear out?  Can you find the useless extra information in this word problem?

This is why people like me failed math in school - questions like THAT made. me. apeshit.  Simple. questions. like. that.

*hangs head in shame*

240.   (LOL.  Thanks Erica.  That answer was so simple it's stupid, too.)

But, I have clean sneakers, I technically lost weight, and I am sure I am a healthier girl for walking that much.

PS.  I have realized that it requires serious BPM music for me to keep on pace while walking and trying to wog.  I have tired of everything on my play-list.  EVERYTHING.  I keep reloading CASCADA, because her stuff has the right BPM.  Apparently I need me some techno.  Help.

I totally, almost, came in last place.

I took part in my first 5K today.  Hold your applause.  I walked.  In fact, laughing took place, because we were lapped by old men, several times.  But whatever, we finished, and didn't even break a sweat.

Here's the thing, I could have walked faster, or even "wogged" a little, but I had the evil baby with me, and I started off on the wrong foot so to speak, trying to get my camera to work since we were at the beach, and what did I forget?  No memory card. 

I started at the end of the pile of humans, and ended at the same place.  When we finished the race, I asked the person taking my number if I was "last," and she was very positive and said, "No, there's some behind you,"  I said, "Aww, too bad, I was hoping I was last." 

I think she thought I was nuts.

I may have said out loud that "one year from now," dog help me, that I could "run this."  That is, if my body doesn't implode before then.

Here's the food damage and such.

Weight - 167 lbs.  * four pounds bounce up!!*  (Love that, doncha?)

My damage, and it was, it was a crappy day.  I had a rotten day.  I am sick, or I have some seriously horrible allergies.  I hate whining, but I am really miserable.

• Breakfast - (In the car, hadn't eaten at home.)  A few bites of a croissant, egg, bacon, and quit, as I realized I couldn't eat the whole thing and not get hypoglycemic during the race, so I threw it away.
  
• Lunch - (After the race, Free Catered Food!) One half hamburger on white roll with mayo
  
• Snack - Skim milk cappuccino + four dark chocolate almonds.
• Dinner - Bacon, shredded lettuce and tomato + pita pocket

hey sister go sister.

he met marmalade at old moulin rouge... you wanna give it a go...

I'm on the treadmill.  Thanks to that freaking show last night - The Biggest Loser - which I've never really been persuaded by or bothered with?  Last night I was watching it and every other word out of my mouth was profane - professing my delight in the contestants complete transformations with DIET AND MANY HOURS of exercise. 

I'm the first to admit that I am one lazy ****.  I should be 300+ lbs right now - considering my lack of actual exercise.  Sure, I have excuses, but none good enough to not move this saggy ass.  It's not that I am lazy at all, it's that I loathe exercise that is not also in some way using my brain.  (Sick?)  Does that explain why I have the laptop on my treadmill while I walk?  (I'm only at 3.0 mph.)

If that show influenced me to take One Goddamned Walk, it was probably worth it.

Maybe, just maybe, it'll stick.

No wog for you.

In my exuberance on the treadmill in the last couple of days, I realized a few things.  First, don't "wog" on the treadmill wearing socks that might slip down because they're probably not yours, and probably your daughters'.  Second, stop "wogging" as soon as you feel there might be a little fah-riction rubbing the back of your heel absolutely raw.  Next, do not take your shoes off and go without sneakers altogether while you "wog" because the ball of each foot will get a lovely friction burn as well.  Especially don't continue to "wog" when you feel it happening and ignore it because it's "nothing."  Now, I can't figure out how to get on the treadmill today - I can't wear my sneakers, and I can't go sock-footed.

I've got a marching band in my pants.

Really, I do. 

I cannot physically walk, walk-jog, (hereafter I will call a "wog") on the treadmill without being on the beat.  I wait for the beat, hell, I mark with my damn foot, step-off, and left, left, left, left.  If the music slows, I slow.  If the music speeds up - my fat ass is flopping all over the place to match the tempo.  The problem is, I just want to go at a certain rate - say 4.0 for a half hour or so, without slowing down.  I need a list of music to put together to do just that.  Does anyone have a link to someplace or someone else's site that I could snag a list of songs at certain tempos - or even their playlists?!  I've looked before, and I can not find something appropriate, at least that didn't require the iPod or that cost.  So, help!