MM - BBGC - Life After WLS

Baby, turn the lights down looooow. NaBloPoMo #2.

I get paid on Fridays, and that means, what?  It's grocery + etc day.  My entire paycheck (seeing as how small it is because I am making you a cup of coffee right now) goes to the groceries.  While that seems absolutely nuts, to work 30-35 hours to buy groceries, gas and household needs, it's helping, because it's no longer coming out of HIS paycheck, see?

Some TMI - since I have new readers lately - I have four kids  I had been working sporadically since numero uno came along, off and on, with a few months of this or that - and it's never really worked out, because it always comes down to who's job is paying the bills (his!) and we haven't used daycare- ever.   In 2005, I got a "real" job, doing something I actually liked (GASP) and things were okay - I brought home enough to buy the groceries, pay for the holiday-giftages, birthdays, and a few bills, even.  I took on overtime as it was allowed, and was able to help out much more.

Because I have a bag on my head.

Why the hell not?  I am currently mid hair dyeing.  I am trying L'oreal True Brunettes Ultra Ash Brown.  It swears that I won't have a "hint of brassiness."  That's a bold statement.  My hair always turns orangey with at home hair coloring that is meant to lighten it at all.

Considering I dumped the whole squirt bottle on my lack of hair, it was dripping everywhere.  I tied a damn bag on my head.  It's working, and oh-so-stylish!  I'll let you know if it works - because what I seek - is light brown hair without the reds.  It's impossible.

Now, for the real topic hidden in the post?  The MCAD responded to my preliminary appeal hearing - and found lack of probable cause (again).  "This means that investigation and appeal evidence fails to establish sufficient evidence to determine that an unlawful act of discrimination has been committed."  Not a surprise at all, this was just a repeat of the initial finding.  It's very possible, also, that my paperwork that went up to the commission at the beginning of the month was thrown out - because it was SO late.  I got that paperwork to my lawyer in APRIL, and he didn't pass it to the commission until SEPTEMBER.  Figures.  That may have triggered a finding in my favor (that the company did indeed can me for whistle-blowing, which they did) without going to court, if it had been processed timely.  Now it's up to me, do I want to drag it to Superior Court and a jury?  I wanted to, straight away at the beginning, but filing with the MCAD + EEOC is required in such cases, and it was suggested to me that I see if they would "find cause" and let it be done.  Of course, sitting idle waiting for this for eighteen months has been hellish also - and I believe I deserve to go to court.

Crazy Bitch.

So, I got an mp3 player you know, "to use for exercise."  I am slowly building a library of music.  Especially butt-moving tunes.  I have a confession.  I love terrible songs, they get my fat ass moving.  Seriously.  Let me tell you - I have never moved faster than I move for naughty songs.

What gets YOU moving?  What songs make you walk faster?  I won't be running just yet, but, I'd like to Walk. With. Intensity.  Music helps with this endeavor, especially on the treadmill because my ADDish brain wants to get off and do laundry mid-stride.

Help me make a seriously terrible angry playlist.  Rotten songs and angry ones seem to make one walk FAST.  Ain't nobody walking fast to love songs.  You need a motivation, an anger, something in mind.  So, what's it for you?

Let's make a list:

Stronger - Kanye West (It's on MySpace right now.  It's a bit slow, but, left right left right, it's alright.)

N S F W ~ I warned you. "Crazy Bitch."

What Not To Do.

Remember how I mentioned that I interviewed for a big girl jay oh bee the other day - and also went for a second meeting?  Well, here's a piece of advice.  When you're discussing new potential opportunities, try not to mention bad ex-employers.  The question, posed to me?  "Have you ever been fired?"  The answer is yes.  The explanation is tricky - and as he said, "Kind of unbelievable."

Because, it is.

Unless you were there, you wouldn't think it was at all possible to have gone down the way it did.  He says to me that I don't have to explain any more than I'm willing to - but - from where he sits, it concerns him.  Duh.  It would concern me, if I were a biz owner/manager/etc. I see immediately, that he's worried that I'm some sort of corporation gold-digger, looking for a scam.  Or, likely to tattle again on someone in his company. *sigh*  What were my options, though?  When asked a question, I try to be honest?  Should I have lied about being fired?  I never once considered lying about it.  I explained as best I could, but he was just not having it.  He wanted to know how it was even remotely plausible that the ex-company didn't at least "apologize" for what happened.  I just shook my head.  I asked him if then he understood that was WHY I was pursuing this to begin with.  He said that if that were HIS company - heads would roll.  Sure, that's what I thought, too.

While he didn't give me the position, he offered taking me on probationary-like for a matter of a few months, and to see how things play out.  I don't know how I could make that work, because he's talking part time with no guarantees at the end of the temp slot.

I hate that I can't be "trusted" because of this whole stupid ****ing situation.  Thanks "Eh Seymour!"

.

It's funny - you can totally tell when I being "productive."  Beth no blog when making "productive."  Yesterday, the interview and the appeal hearing, today, "working."  I put that in quotes, because, frankly, making cawfee is not really working, I mean it is, but... drinking espresso and wiping counters is much like what I do at home - But! Without! Children!  It's a slight vacation, no?  It is, if you don't have four kids, don't tell me it isn't.

Anyways - what can we blog about? We had two floors replaced today - and BETH HAS NO TOILET at the moment.  That's right, kids, hold yer pee.  (Thank goodness we have a camper, so I wouldn't really be saying that.) Tomorrow, the tub/walls will be finished, and the potty can go back on the floor.  Phew.

Now, for the real subject of the post:

The *lawyers were reading all sorts of blog today.  (Nod and smile, ladies, we have company!)  Say hello!

Referring Link	http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22melting mama%22&btnG=Google Search
Host Name
IP Address	208.255.90.221 Nixon Peabody LLP [Edit Label]
Country	United States
Region	New York
City	Rochester
ISP	Nixon Peabody Llp
Returning Visits	0
Visit Length	26 mins 54 secs

Date	Time	WebPage
5th September 2007	11:19:55	www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22melting mama%22&btnG=Google Search melting mama
5th September 2007	11:22:14	www.google.com/custom?domains=meltingmama.typepad.com&q=MCAD&sitesearch=meltingmama.typepad.com&sa=Google Search&client=pub-2417767540587575&fo melting mama: Mah trailah pahk baby.
5th September 2007	11:23:29	www.google.com/custom?domains=meltingmama.typepad.com&q=MCAD&sitesearch=meltingmama.typepad.com&sa=Google Search&client=pub-2417767540587575&fo melting mama: Vomit, blood   lawyers.
5th September 2007	11:25:07	www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22melting mama%22&btnG=Google Search melting mama
5th September 2007	11:26:37	www.google.com/custom?hl=en&client=pub-2417767540587575&cof=FORID%3A1%3BGL%3A1%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BLC%3A%230000ff%3BVLC%3A%23663399%3BGFNT%3A%230 melting mama: Mah trailah pahk baby.
5th September 2007	11:27:55	meltingmama.typepad.com/wls/2007/08/mah-trailah-pah.html melting mama: July 2007
5th September 2007	11:31:45	meltingmama.typepad.com/wls/2007/07/index.html melting mama: August 2007
5th September 2007	11:33:33	www.google.com/custom?hl=en&client=pub-2417767540587575&cof=FORID%3A1%3BGL%3A1%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BLC%3A%230000ff%3BVLC%3A%23663399%3BGFNT%3A%230 melting mama: Part two in a series, love letters from the internets.
5th September 2007	11:35:58	www.google.com/custom?hl=en&client=pub-2417767540587575&cof=FORID%3A1%3BGL%3A1%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BLC%3A%230000ff%3BVLC%3A%23663399%3BGFNT%3A%230 melting mama: June 2007
5th September 2007	11:41:38	www.google.com/custom?hl=en&client=pub-2417767540587575&cof=FORID%3A1%3BGL%3A1%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BLC%3A%230000ff%3BVLC%3A%23663399%3BGFNT%3A%230 melting mama: March 2007
5th September 2007	11:46:49	www.google.com/custom?hl=en&client=pub-2417767540587575&cof=FORID%3A1%3BGL%3A1%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BLC%3A%230000ff%3BVLC%3A%23663399%3BGFNT%3A%230 melting mama: Current Affairs

I told you they'd be here today, didn't I?  Anyways - the update was right on the front page, couldn't hardly miss it. 

This is the kind of moment one wishes they started anonymous blogging from the start so they could just spew what they Really Want To Say, but can't. I've been up front about this entire issue from the beginning, and the only regret I have is not sharing every.single.detail from day one. 

I should have made a full on time line on the blog - publicly.  I didn't.  I was scared poop-less to do so.  I was here, writing less frequently, but I had about 75% less readership, and I was terrified to lose my job (which I did anyways, a lot of good that did) and of being threatened, because persons in question knew that I was a "blogger."

Another?  When "interviewed" about the issues by the companies' HR dept?  SAYING A ****ING WORD to that non-neutral party (coincidentally, the woman who hired me).  Anyone who might be thinking about whistle-blowing or going public about a sexual harassment problem (or the like) - don't talk to the company. Don't answer any questions. Don't let them ask you to "go somewhere to talk." 

Don't tell them a thing - until you consult your own attorney.

If I knew then what I know now - I'd have walked away from her coyly wrapped promises of protection and a cup of coffee.

No one wants to protect you.  They only want to cover their own asses.

Duck and cover when the poop hits the fan.