Melting Mama

Apathy and failure

Recently when I saw a fresh weight loss and posted it, I was confronted with a commenter who asked me why I posted my body-weight.  It is a fair question and I do not challenge her asking it, because it's been asked of me many times when I have posted my actual weight-as-a-number.

I will say that number-sharing is the norm (...or was?) in the weight loss surgery/bariatric community as a whole for as long as I have been a part of it -- and that is at least 10-12 years that I have actively read and participated in emails, groups and chats.  I posted the question as a poll this morning on Facebook as well.  Go answer!  Come back.

Back in the hey-day of message boards we would add a line of text to our signatures (..siggies!) to signify our -

• HW (Highest Weight)
• SW (Start Weight or Surgery Weight)
• CW (Current Weight)
• GW (Goal Weight)

They would look alot like this!

Beth 

HW - 320  SW - 298  CW - 151 - GW - 150

Don't judge the comic-sans.  

I would go back to *my old posts circa 2003/2004 and show you, except I was banned from my message board back then, and my posts via BethLButterfly disappeared.  She posted in Comic Sans at times. Her demise is why MM exists.

Number or weight sharing is.  Was.  Always will be?  I would say that in general -- most individuals that have bariatric surgery are often proud of every single pound lost, and want to wear their "pounds lost" as a badge of honor.  Some post ops are extraordinarily proud and not only wear the pounds lost, current weight, but will add things like "LBS GONE FOREVER!"  

Losing weight is no easy feat, and after bariatric surgery -- it feels like victory. Why wouldn't someone want to own it -- even just for a while?  I suppose when you've been 500, 400, 300, 250 lbs -- wearing a newly slimmed down self is quite a change and being able to put that number out there to the universe -- even just for a while is worth it.

Now, for me.  This commenter wondered if my posting about my actual number was an obsession - let me clear it up here.  No.  I've always weighed myself.  

Bariatric surgery and the life afterwards is ALL ABOUT NUMBERS.  Losing pounds, inches, and sometimes counting calories, measuring food, and exercise.  If you're a pre-op that doesn't want to 'hear that' - I am sorry - but it really, truly, is.

I absolutely understand that some people take these numbers to an extreme - and extremes are unhealthy at any level -- and that is how we get into situations like: needing bariatric surgery.  Extreme caloric intake is unhealthy, an extreme sedentary lifestyle is unhealthy.  We require balance.  

It takes a very long time for some people to learn this:  example ---->  ME.

While I have always "weighed-in,"  I am also The Queen Of Avoidance, and as soon as I see the scale move up - I remove the scale.  (That's magic, if I can't see my regain, no one else can.  That is, until I SEE THE PHOTO EVIDENCE MYSELF AND SCREAM.  *See below.)  

So what has changed?  I removed myself from the effects of negative influences -- changed my views on some things and ... GASP ...

I added ACCOUNTABILITY to my daily life.  I now weigh myself near-daily, or at LEAST weekly.  I check-in my food nearly every single day on a journal.  

Is that obsessive?  No.  Why?  Because before -- not paying attention led to weight regain.  Surrounding myself by people with negative and apathetic views on life - brought me down.

Apathy causes failure.  

Yes, I am fully aware I am a Bariatric Bad Girl - but maybe now you understand - BAD DOES NOT EQUATE "BAD," or breaking rules, or doing things WRONG.  

It's BAD-ASS.  (Help us help, BTW.)

*June 2012 - April 2013

 

But, recently I started paying attention - and seeing results:

My brain likes to see results, black and white, literal, on paper, in lines, to show me that if I DO X - Y WILL HAPPEN.

Because it works.  (Shut up Weight Watchers.)  And my little brain likes proof.   

If I can see tangible results I will keep going - I will keep doing a thing if I can see a result.  I do not like to work for "free - " you see.  Does that make sense?  Here's an example, a very simple one.  I started going to the gym and doing basic exercise (...long walks on the treadmill and seated elliptical) about a month ago (...I'll check back in my Facebook check ins) and I noticed a tangible result the night before last.  My leg muscles are coming back.  This is enough to create a positive reaction to keep me motivated.  

It's not about obsessing about a number.  I don't have a goal.  

•  Help the BBGC Help.  

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Report: Some money in Lap-Band settlement to pay for billboards on weight-loss surgery risks

AP -  Report: Some money in Lap-Band settlement to pay for billboards on weight-loss surgery risks

LOS ANGELES — A company that promoted Lap-Band weight-loss surgery has agreed to pay $1.3 million to settle a false-advertising lawsuit, with some of the money going to billboards warning the public about the risks of weight-loss surgery, a newspaper reported Thursday.

From 2009 to 2011, five patients died after Lap-Band surgeries at clinics affiliated with the 1-800-GET-THIN ad campaign, according to the Los Angeles Times (http://lat.ms/11knLBS ).

The proposed settlement still needs the approval of Los Angeles County Superior Court Judge Kenneth Freeman, who asked attorneys at a hearing Thursday to provide more information and resubmit their settlement motion before he gives the deal his OK.

Relatives of two of the dead patients, Ana Renteria and Laura Faitro, filed the lawsuit as a class action in 2011.

The lawsuit sought damages from several companies and two brothers, Michael and Julian Omidi, who court documents said owned and managed Top Surgeons, a weight-loss business.

John Hueston, an attorney for the Omidis, said the settlement was not an admission of wrongdoing.

“Under the agreement, our clients ... are dismissed without any admission of liability, and made no contribution whatsoever to the settlements,” Hueston said in a statement cited by the Times.

A lawyer for the surgery centers, Konrad Trope, said the action against the facilities was dismissed without admission of liability or financial penalty.

The proposed settlement will be paid only by Top Surgeons, one of the companies behind the GET-THIN operation, the newspaper said. The company did not immediately return a message from The Associated Press.

The lawsuits and other public documents showed that 1-800-GET-THIN was a marketing company that steered patients to a network of outpatient clinics, where thousands of weight-loss surgeries were performed.

The company used dozens of billboards — along with ads on television, radio and the Internet — to promote Lap-Band weight-loss surgery.

Some of the suits alleged that the clinics put profits above patient safety, employing physicians who were unqualified and allowing surgeries to be performed in unsanitary conditions, the Times said.

The proposed deal calls for $100,000 to be spent on billboard advertising throughout Southern California “intended to explain the risks of weight-loss surgery.” The agreement does not specify the language to be used in the ads but says it must be approved by the court.

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Study - Expectations for weight loss and willingness to accept risk among patients seeking weight loss surgery.

Just a warning, this is NOT a pleasant Rainbow and Butterflies study for those in the early or research stages of weight loss surgery.

Study -

Expectations for weight loss and willingness to except risk - JAMA -

Importance  Weight loss surgery (WLS) has been shown to produce long-term weight loss but is not risk free or universally effective. The weight loss expectations and willingness to undergo perioperative risk among patients seeking WLS remain unknown.

Objectives  To examine the expectations and motivations of WLS patients and the mortality risks they are willing to undertake and to explore the demographic characteristics, clinical factors, and patient perceptions associated with high weight loss expectations and willingness to assume high surgical risk.

Design  We interviewed patients seeking WLS and conducted multivariable analyses to examine the characteristics associated with high weight loss expectations and the acceptance of mortality risks of 10% or higher.

Setting  Two WLS centers in Boston.

Participants  Six hundred fifty-four patients.

Main Outcome Measures  Disappointment with a sustained weight loss of 20% and willingness to accept a mortality risk of 10% or higher with WLS.

Results  On average, patients expected to lose as much as 38% of their weight after WLS and expressed disappointment if they did not lose at least 26%.

Most patients (84.8%) accepted some risk of dying to undergo WLS, but only 57.5% were willing to undergo a hypothetical treatment that produced a 20% weight loss.

The mean acceptable mortality risk to undergo WLS was 6.7%, but the median risk was only 0.1%; 19.5% of all patients were willing to accept a risk of at least 10%.

Women were more likely than men to be disappointed with a 20% weight loss but were less likely to accept high mortality risk.

After initial adjustment, white patients appeared more likely than African American patients to have high weight loss expectations and to be willing to accept high risk.

Patients with lower quality-of-life scores and those who perceived needing to lose more than 10% and 20% of weight to achieve “any” health benefits were more likely to have unrealistic weight loss expectations.

Low quality-of-life scores were also associated with willingness to accept high risk.

Conclusions and Relevance 

Most patients seeking WLS have high weight loss expectations and believe they need to lose substantial weight to derive any health benefits.

Educational efforts may be necessary to align expectations with clinical reality.

/end study

NO SHIT, REALLY?!  Go back and READ IT AGAIN.

Now go read this: http://www.drsharma.ca/how-much-are-people-willing-to-risk-for-bariatric-surgery.html

WHAT HAVE WE BEEN TELLING YOU?!  Please.  START.  LISTENING.

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Regain After Weight Loss Surgery.

Left -  Fitbloggin' 2012  Right - This Week - Lost the regain  - Also, 3 pounds to my lowest weight.

Several years ago, a woman messaged on a weight loss surgery forum and told me that my weight chart resembled a roller-coaster and that she wanted to "help me get control."  After a quick Google search -- I noted she was seeking a new client for her weight loss surgery coaching business and dumped her "friendship."

Friends do not pay friends to help them lose weight, maintain weight loss or to help them lose regained weight after weight loss surgery.  If you are paying someone for your friendship, it might be time to redefine that friendship -- just saying.  I suppose this changes if your friend happens to be a weight loss professional?  But how often does that happen -- and how many weight loss professionals would potentially destroy a friendship with aligning with your weight loss journey?

Um.  No.  A professional would NOT.

• Weight loss is personal.
• It is something you choose for yourself when you are ready.
• Weight loss is not something you can be talked into - nor shamed into.  

Regain after weight loss surgery is also a very touchy subject.  Countless bariatric patients go through it -- and less want to talk about it.  But it seems like everyone wants to sell "us" something to fix it.  

Let me repeat -

• Weight loss is personal.
• It is something you choose for yourself when you are ready.
• Weight loss is not something you can be talked into - nor shamed into.  

Yet it seems like the larger community wants "us"  (the regainers) to feel shamed for regaining and wants to sell us another quick-fix.

Let us discuss:  Regain is common.  How much?  Some is very typical.  Sometimes even a lot of regain is normal.  You do not have to be sold into another diet, quick-fix, or scam.  You need to remind yourself why you had weight loss surgery to begin with --

...for your HEALTH.  

Some good links on regain -

• http://www.obesityaction.org/educational-resources/resource-articles-2/weight-loss-surgery/why-am-i-struggling-with-my-weight-i-am-doing-everything-right
• http://www.obesityaction.org/educational-resources/resource-articles-2/weight-loss-surgery/treating-weight-regain-after-weight-loss-surgery
  

 

 

 

 

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Recommended Carbohydrate Levels After Gastric Bypass

Via Bariatric Times -

After you read this study, let's discuss:  

• Did your nutritionist give YOU guidance in regards to carbohydrate intake after your roux en y gastric bypass surgery?

• Background: Exact carbohydrate levels needed for the bariatric patient population have not yet been defined. The aim of this study was to correlate carbohydrate intake to percent excess weight loss for the bariatric patient population based on a cross-sectional study. The author also aimed to review the related literature.
• Materials and Methods: A cross-sectional study was conducted, along with a review of the literature, about patients who underwent Roux-en-Y gastric bypass at least 1 year previously. Patients had their percentage of excess weight loss calculated and energy intake was examined based on data collected with a four-day food recall. Patients were divided into two groups: 1) patients who consumed 130g/day or more of carbohydrates and 2) patients who consumed less than 130g/day of carbohydrates. 
• Limitations: The literature review was limited to papers published since 1993. 

• Results: Patients who consumed 130g/day or more of carbohydrates presented a lower percent excess weight loss than the other group (p= 0.038). In the review of the literature, the author found that six months after surgery patients can ingest about 850kcal/day of carbohydrates, 30 percent being ingested as lipids. A protein diet with at least 60g/day is needed. On this basis, patients should consume about 90g/day of carbohydrates. After the first postoperative year, energy intake is about 1,300kcal/day and protein consumption should be increased. We can, therefore, establish nearly 130g/day of carbohydrates (40% of their energy intake) 
• Conclusions: Based on these studies, the author recommends that 90g/day is adequate for patients who are six months post Roux-en-Y gastric bypass and less than 130g/day is adequate for patients who are one year or more post surgery. 
• The author concludes that maintaining carbohydrate consumption to moderate quantities and adequate protein intake seems to be fundamental to ensure the benefits from bariatric surgery.

- http://bariatrictimes.com/recommended-levels-of-carbohydrate-after-bariatric-surgery/

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9 Years Post Gastric Bypass.

April 5th, 2013 marks nine years since I had roux en y gastric bypass surgery at Tufts New England Medical Center in Boston, Massachusetts.  I made it another year.  I am alive.  I  made it past your cash bets.

I am approximately five pounds above my very lowest post op weight, which I saw one year post op before I got pregnant and right before I bounced up to 175 lbs.  I will say this, my lower weight looks different the second time around.  That first low-weight crash post surgery looks like death-warmed over.  I look healthier now, and I think it's honestly because I eat food now and haven't had a massive weight loss like in 2004.  

People have asked me "What are you doing differently now?"  

• Food journaling and keeping myself aware of the calories I take in.  I don't journal everyday, but I DO journal.
• I stopped using soy milk, and swapped to unsweetened almond milk in my coffee and for whatever other "milk" uses I have.  I don't use dairy milk at all.
• I quit my Starbucks habit pretty much altogether.  I get an iced coffee or cappuccino if someone else takes ME out for coffee, but it's rare, and definitely less than once a week.  Dunkin Donuts iced coffee, once a week.
• No crackers.  If I must, one serving, with protein.
• No potato chips, etc.  
• No candy, only super dark 70%+ chocolate if I must have something.  One serving.
• No protein bars, except to review them, unless I am REPLACING A MEAL with one.
• No protein shakes, except to review them, unless I am REPLACING A MEAL with one.
• This isn't "new" - but zero alcohol in my house.  It's just a rule.  If it's not here, I can't have it.  It's just the rule.
• If there's one thing I have learned this year - it's that I can't graze without noting.  I can't just nibble all day long and expect that I won't see gains, because I do.  I gain very fast on relatively low calories.

I have also learned that giving up things I can't control - stressors - outside influences - people, even - helps.  I started losing the weight as soon as I made this connection.

Look at my weight loss timeline.  Look at the dates.

 Now look at my regain photos from the last year - same timing.

 Seems easy enough, right?  

 

Let. it. go.

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.”  ― C. JoyBell C.

People CAN be TOXIC to your HEALTH.   Let. them. go.

(*Not the ones in this photo.  LOL.  But, I am also 25 lbs lighter SINCE these photos and the timeline.  It's a visual.)

Here's to YEAR ten.  It's a big one.  

*foreshadowing....*

2013 WLS Awards Announcements

Listen to internet radio with Diva Taunia on Blog Talk Radio

Thanks Taunia, thanks everyone who voted!  

PS.  I THINK every single thing I voted for, won too!  ;)   We're a great community sometimes.

xo

• The WLS Awards are *nominated by* and *voted on* by members of the WLS Community. Any person, business, or charitable organization that is part of the weight loss surgery and bariatric community is eligible, EXCEPT Diva Taunia and last year's winners.

• http://www.divatauniablog.com
  http://www.facebook.com/divataunia
  http://www.twitter.com/divataunia
  

 

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It's not about a number.

I'm not a shopper. Since I work from home, I rarely get new clothes.

The other day I noticed that New York + Co had a 50% off everything sale and went in. The saleswoman said to me, "You look like you'd rather be anywhere but here." 

I told her that I am not fan of clothes shopping, and she called me "Cute," and "Small." 

Small. Snort.

I laughed, and realized soon why I have so much dismay for clothes shopping. THE FITTING ROOM. THE LIGHTS.

THE VARICOSE VEINS. I have the legs of an 80 year old woman.

It's not about SIZES or the number on my scale, because I am nearly to my lowest weight.  I reached my lowest weight just after one year post op, I hit 149 pounds for one day and regained immediately.  

I am 156 pounds today.  

I still don't like the melted candle puddle of skin that I have -- nine years later. Full honesty, I am FINE with it once I am wearing appropriate undergarments and everything is in it's place, but even in a size 8P (I also bought a pair of 6P) - sometimes you feel like a puddle of flesh.

It's not about a number.

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